25.2.16

After speaking to Joe Harding yesterday in my meeting going through the feedback from what Jane had said about what I need to improve on to help me get a higher grade following on from my last module she made me aware of the fact after I mentioned to her about the fact that Jane had suggested I read again this book which was about A boy with Asperger’s which is what I have called The Curious Incident of the Dog in The Night –Time.

Which I have started to read again the first chapter that my work should start to be about this condition I have it will make it more honest and get to the heart of the matter of how I work and with my figures what makes me do things in a certain away.

This worries me because I find this part of me uncomfortable to talk about because it’s what it is and I don’t like the idea of making it a big deal in my work, it might make me hating my own work which is the last thing I want to do because I love my work but because I am focusing on a part of me which I would rather not use in my work it will create this awkward depressed vibe I feel in it so it won’t be so much of a positive happy vibe anymore and it will get darning for me and others.

I want to be brave and be able to push myself really hard and this is the extreme for me but in order for me to improve achieve a higher grade which I really want this might have to happen in fact it’s already started with me reading this book again it’s so personal bringing in this part of me into the discussion of my work, I wish it was easy for me to just talk about it, but I have gone about my life just not really thinking about a lot to now think about it in detail again it brings up my past when I was younger and got bullied and I would rather not think about it.

The positives are from having this incorporated into my work is that people might understand me better my working methods how I go about what I do because a lot of it has to do with the fact I have AS (AS is a shortening for Asperger’s by the way in case anyone is wondering) even my fellow peers might because I don’t really speak about it with them a lot I mention I have meetings on a Thursday with Joe Harding and they saw when I had Kathryn supporting me.

I mean why I would want to talk about it to them a lot when we can talk about less deep matters and have a laugh and talk about art.

Reading first chapter thoughts.

I read the first chapter as I said was interesting it surprised weirdly because I have read it before but quite a few years ago me because Christopher the boy telling the story the main character when he introduced himself he didn’t say he has Asperger’s just the capital cities he could know off by heart. I was expecting him to explain about the fact he had it, but I guess in the first chapter that would be a massive intense spoiler give away some people would rather wait till further on to find out because it creates mystery then and apprehension.

Me being the type of person which hates surprises I find this slightly annoying and frustrating just get to the point for god’s sake but turning it round if I was in his shoes I probably would of left it to further on in the book I am not sure to be honest who knows I won’t will I? Unless I write a book as myself as the main character.

I am intrigued to read on and re discover this book until then I leave it here.

Below is a photo of the book featured

curious incident of the dog in the nightime

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